A shard prized for its modesty

a stag
the yarrow
three sticks haphazardly handled

give me a pull
that sucks the marrow clean

one atop the other
laid out

as far as they could tell
what they had
was the other

I speak as the infinite
one said

The other,
I, a mouth
a gaping hole
sucking off the sun

One cried
I’ve died so many times

The other
wrapped the shard in a rag
dripping with gasoline

I’ve given you so many things
and here you come asking for more
the one who had died proclaimed

turn the emptying on from inside
and let it pull you through the pith
you have pith inside of pith
let yourself shed
what you call pith
to find the pith inside of pith

my thighs pulse to the rhythm of your heart crystal

lips wrap round your hunger
mouth flush with acid and honeysuckle

heat clawing earth in the glades
our thirst trapped against the windshield of your car

suck the air from my lungs
until I choke on condensation

salmon spawning between two rivers

I won’t tell you how I said your name for months before I met you
how I could imagine a heritage of hurt pulsing through my veins
pounding these cells through thrusts of sex
and that, in time, I would learn to drain your rivers of fire
into my buried acquifers
the ones I discovered in my exile

I woke to break karmic wheels

The fact that your name knew my lips is inconsequential
what matters is that when fire meets water
there is steam
my darling, of course, and oh
but there’s also ash
and it descends as silt
bringing new life to the ocean

I know because I am an ocean

He said it would be bitter
the poet whose book I left at your house
but yours was sweet
the taste of sugar and sickness
it colonized my mouth
slipping past my tongue
so that with each breath
I could taste you

I delight in not caging you
I delight in your freedom
I delight in your delight
a field beyond possession

Did you know that I was coming for you?
That I have spent centuries waiting for you on this earth of living and dying?

I will find you, with or without your map
and I will enter you
without invitation
because long ago
when we were together in the woods
before we were separated
we made a promise to one another
and that gave me purpose to advance through the final gates
where I lost everything
including the ability to hold an individuated self in relation to you

but I remember our promise
and, folly as it is to quest for anything within this unified fabric
of knotting and unknotting
and ever-unfolding patterns of pointless brilliance
I vow to honor my committment

I want to devour you
and reassemble you in my chest

coat you in lavender and wax
and birthe you from my third eye
on a river of light

This is how the gods fuck
thrusting sunlight
into soul fiber

tender fuzz green
rubbed raw to cracked palms

I’m learning to milk your sorrow
your failure
your desperation
your teething anger
so thick with frothy hurt

When a wound rises
it sends a call to the honeybees
who ride the forest’s edge
seeking night blossoms
of ash pollen
to spin into life gold

Did you know there is a field beyond the forests
where the honeybees keep their hives?

Some fear what they’ll find there
but its just a field

Although it is true
that for a moment
just a moment
when you pass the forest’s edge that very first time
you feel the loss of everything at once
and it can be terribly terribly painful
pith inside of pith
you’ll remind yourself
but, I assure you,
the pain is acute
and soon passes
and then you will sit with the others
as many before you have done
and watch the forests become verbs
as you learn to chose frameworks of your own world-making

You told me you would never deny my advances
so I went until I could go no further and found myself
emerging from the inky darkness

I call our space water thirst

I found it when I went looking for the words
to tell you
“I see you as you”
in the language your mother used
to kiss away your tears

I vigil with you inside your nascent core
the sphere of light at the center of your loss

When my wings stir
somewhere a rose bush flames with, tell me my love
spill its, tell me
onto the, tell me
with its, tell me your unspoken words

I have shifted
from groping other in the homespeak of earth hurt
to trace you everywhere
without privledging
any silvery point

I find you in the atom
the jet stream
the inward coil of sea snails
our love a greased ball-bearing

the night we breathed in cycles of ocean moon hunger
you used olive oil from the kitchen to fuck me

I received you as generational cascade
a river of longing filtered through flesh

the olive tree so self-sustaining
bares fruit from such scarce rain

I whisphered “which god are you?”
You said you didn’t want the hubris of a god

I told you humans have hubris, not gods,
but what I meant to say was that
I make gods to break them

but I couldn’t because
the tip of your cock was pulsing in my throat

I am swarm
a flocking intellect
pitched to overflow

the rose tip of my desire burns in you
tasting of sand and nectar

all night it rains
as our collective tears
fill the canyons
and flood the service roads

Let us stay here by the radio
eat these crackers
and wait